Divorce is a terrible thing. It does nothing but take from everyone involved. It takes away trust. It damages the heart. It has the ability to affect all aspects of life. Dreams deteriorate and it leaves people hurt and most importantly vulnerable. The enemy thrives in this type of environment. He finds pleasure in our weakness because it gives him an advantage. He wants us to believe that we are defined by our relationships. We are defined by others’ views of us. We are powerless against this.
But there’s a problem with that. We are NOT defined by these things. We have something that he can’t take away. Peace. God’s peace. Peace that surpasses all understanding!
I’ve been divorced legally well over a year now, but for some reason it can still be a sensitive subject for me. Recently one of the churches I attend started a series on marriage. I cringed a little! I know it’s an extremely important subject and I try to maintain a positive attitude and put the advice in my back pocket for a future relationship or conversation; but sometimes the reminder of my past is like a dagger. Although pastor was in no way condemning toward those of us that are divorced, I still felt a little shame. That shame was just another lie the enemy placed in my mind. He was trying to distract me from the message. God knows what happened — He was with me every step of the way. He led me and comforted me when I was making the most difficult decision of my life.
Last night was the final sermon in the series and it was a little rough for me starting out. Hearing about all the things that can ruin a marriage and remembering living every single thing pastor mentioned stirred up the usual emotions. Then he got to the end of the sermon. He laid out a few things for singles that you need to look out for in someone you are considering marrying one day. Usually this is just another reminder of all the obvious signs I ignored in the past and decisions that I made selfishly and without God’s guidance. But this time I listened with an open heart — not a crushed one — and it shed a whole new light for me. I feel encouraged and I feel excited about the man that God will eventually put in my life. I feel excited to have someone one day that will cherish me and take care of me and keep me safe. Someone I can submit to and honor and respect. I’ve never had that before. Finally, with this, I can say that I trust God with EVERY aspect of my life — including relationships. I know I’m not ready for all of that just yet, and until I am I can finally have 100% peace with where I am at. Thank God for that…literally…
By Emily Meadows